These Wednesday's are rolling around faster than any other day of the week, I don't care what anyone tell's ya...
Here is yet another one of my meticulously researched and pulchritudiously presented poems which attempt to dissuade you from bringing various life forms to various places (preferably places of business) - Wildebeests in Waterstones, and Púcas in Poulaphouca - coming up in due course....
A poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your Capuchin Monkey to Woodies
Don't bring your Capuchin Monkey to Woodies
He doesn't need brass knobs or rings, and nor should he -
arborial living doesn't need DIY goodies
So tell him his tears he must quench
This fiendishly clever tool using monkey*
wouldn't waste any time investing in clunky
aul fixtures and fittings, it wouldn't be funky
Let him know he's being left on the bench
No he can't have a lawnmower, a mallet or drill
He can't feast on the nuts, can't go in and spill
all the paint, on the window that's meant for the sill
and there'll be no chance of a monkey wrench
For Capuchin Monkeys don't know how to behave
on the decking and fences it'd be very grave
when they'd chew on the edges, you couldn't be saved
No Woodies for your Capuchin Monkey today
*Capuchin Monkeys are one of the first monkeys known to have used tools.
Tonight I'm reading "A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your Geranium to Boots" at a very special Joycean Chemist based event... there's only room for 20 people at it, including performers, so I didn't advertise too heavily here, but hope you'll all come along in spirit.