Giraffe to Black Tie

So - although I'm not back from the mad adventure yet, another poem which attempts to dissuade you, in a world of reckless abandonment and permissiveness, please don't...

I'll be back tonight really in real life if all goes to plan!

A Poem which attempts to dissuade you from bringing your Giraffe to Black Tie

Don't bring your Giraffe into Black Tie,
the staff would heave a massive sigh,
when they measure and find the neck doesn't comply,
with normal physiological laws

Yes this oversized, gentle ruminant,
has no business looking at pinstriped pants,
and suits with bowties, he simply can't
carry off that look, better pause

I don't care if he gives a response flehmen,
when eyeing the cufflinks, don't forget he's no shamen,
knows no more about clothes, than the average layman,
watch out for his galloping jaws

If you bring him there he'll only start necking,
he'll lick at the cufflinks, you'd have to keep checking
for damaged cravats, he's better off trekking,
no Black Tie for your Giraffe today.